That was a question I was asked recently. By my sister. And it was an interesting question. My sister is the one who should be the regular church go-er. Not me. She's married, has two children, and is a Colonel in the Air Force. She's practically the poster child for the type of person who attends church. But she doesn't. And it wasn't always that way.

Both my sister and I were born and raised in the Episcopal Church. My father was in the Army and no matter where he was stationed, we would always find an Episcopal Church to attend. I was confirmed at St. John's Episcopal Church in Fayetteville, NC (home of Ft. Bragg and the 82nd Airborne Division) at the age of 12, with my arm in a cast. Needless to say it made taking my first communion a little bit difficult. But as is typical, my sister and I both sort of fell away from the church during our college years.

My drifting was a bit more understandable. As a gay man, what church would want me? Aren't I an abomination, or intrinsically disordered? I'm not by the way. An abomination or intrinsically disordered. Not to say that I don't have my own issues, but I digress.

I've developed a pretty thick skin over the years. When you are young and you are bullied or taunted, when you are called fattie or faggot or nerd (the bullying trifecta!), you learn to develop a thick skin. You also learn how to avoid the bullies. You find safe spaces. The library was a good option. Bullies usually aren't much for reading.

Sadly, there are too many stories in the news about bullying, anti-gay bullying, and the awful situations that have caused too many GLBT youth to feel that killing themselves is the only answer. And it's not.

Dan Savage's "It Get's Better" project on YouTube has become a wonderful tool to help everyone reach out to at-risk GLBT youth and help put a spotlight on this issue. Hundreds of people around the world are sharing their stories to help give GLBT youth support and to let them know that the dark days of junior high and high school will eventually come to an end and that it will get better.

Last Sunday at the 11AM service here at St. Thomas, we filmed our own "It Get's Better" video. Everyone kind of grouped together over to the left and we said loudly, "God loves you! And it get's soooooo much better." I'm not sure when the finished video will be posted, but keep an eye out for it.

I've joked that the hardest job in the world is working a church booth at a Gay Pride festival. Especially here in the U.S., Christianity has mis-used the Bible to spread a message of hate and unworthiness to the GLBT community to the point where most gays and lesbians have a healthy distrust of religion in general. And it's not surprising that a recent survey said that 2 out of 3 Americans believe gay people commit suicide at least partly because of messages coming out of churches and other places of worship.

Anyways, back to my sister's question. "Why do I go to church?" Because St. Thomas' is my safe place. Because I know that God loves me. And it's where God's unconditional love and understanding are almost palpable. It's a church that loves and accepts me for who I am, faults and all. It's a church that has been a beacon of light and love for so many years. And our "It Get's Better" video is just another example of that. That's why I go to church.